First thing's first. FEATURE! Ana's Girl has a seriously unique take on a pro ana blog. She's written it in prose form instead of the usual journal idea, and it's so interesting to read. A really powerful expression of how she sees the world. Check it out for me, comment to let us know what you think and give her some support!
I had a really shit day today. Loads of arguments with parents and stress with a friend. I was so down in the morning I couldn't get out of bed for ages. So that turned into a bit of a binge day, about 800 cals. Not really bothered honestly, my body doesn't seem to care what I eat atm and I've got bigger problems to worry about, which I won't talk about cos I don't want to depress myself haha
So how do we cope? Alcohol. Not really lol. I submerge myself in a book and let those ideas replace all the stress I have. Currently working myself through Eclipse. I'll end up reading til about 4am this morning... Everyone here seems to be Team Edward. Fair enough, he's the obvious choice BUTTT... Jacob really cares about Bella, he's got fucking sexy in New Moon and his ATTITUDE! Jesus, it's like "you want me, we both know it" and there's something seriously hot about that confidence. I want to see that movie and I want to see it now. Haha.
Who am I kidding? Edward all the way. I'm back at the stage where I'm reading and going WHY ISN'T THIS REAL? hahah
I also can't believe there's never going to be a new Harry Potter book. Hmph. Anyone know any other good series? Read His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman if you haven't yet, it's brilliant and much better than that shitty movie they made of the first one.
I'm lacking in thinspiration. 21lbs in and I'm sort of just losing motivation. I haven't seen the results I want yet and with other stresses mounting up I just want to be weak and take comfort in nice food. It's something I relied on slightly during all the stress on study leave before my A Levels. Just a little system of treats to keep me going through it. I'm not sure what to replace that with now. Books and movies I suppose. I can't rely on the comfort of friends as far as this is concerned because I know I'll only be called selfish/arrogant/self interested or they'll warn me about becoming anorexic and make me eat or feel guilty about it. More guilt is NOT what I need.
So yeah, photos of me were requested so photos of me are here... will be taken down soonish so look quickly and then go get something soothing to heal your eyes with:
... (photos removed) ...
These were all taken before the weight loss... I'll post new ones when I feel i've achieved enough.